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Mug shot Tuesday. Turn me on mug. No need to explain that one. I was working on my research about what turn men on. I really enjoyed doing it. I didn’t get many replies so I probably should call it “what turn some of the men I know (virtually) on”. I wasn’t sure if I should wait some more time and try to get more responses, look for some other answers online or just work with what I had.
I chose to work with what I had and see if I can come up with something while I’m writing. I’m not a planner so let’s see what I can find.

First of all, I want to clarify something.
My dear Twin wrote this:

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I have to agree with her on the part that this is the perfect job for me. I love it. I could write every day about sex and love and relationships. Even if my experiences are not the best ones, I still have a lot to say.

About the ‘always wanting and looking for sex’ part. THAT’S NOT TRUE!! I’m sleeping sometimes.

And the part: ‘I haven’t seen many guys walk away from a pretty woman’. My dad told me I was pretty a couple of days ago but ok, he’s my dad so I won’t count myself as pretty but I can count MANY men walking away from me.

Now that we are clear about that, I can continue. I put my glasses on so I can make this research look a bit more serious (and see the words on the screen).


It’s said that men are more visual than women. That is, they get turned on by an image, and with image I mean ‘something they are seeing’.
But I was really surprised that only a few of the men actually admitted that.
I’ll paste all the screenshots. I tried to circle in red the answers so you don’t have to read too much. What’s underlined in green is what turns on one of my (female) followers. And I agree with her. But I’ll leave that for a future post.

It was surprising to know what women think and what men said that actually turn them on.

Women said these things turn men on:

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If I make a list with everything mentioned above, we have:

-smarmy comments
-things they can’t have
-overtly sexy
-subtle (in opposite to overtly sexy)
-smart women
-women that can make men laugh
-any woman
-everything female
-confident woman
-the ass
-big boobs
-nice smile
-drunk (or close)
-long hair

And these are the things that men said:

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If I make a list:

-window washing (wet t-shirt)
-thoughtful women
-women who can hold a conversation
-role playing
-smart women
-women who are not shy between the sheets

I also got these responses below:

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What can I conclude?

What we women think that turn men on is not so accurate. It seems that men are a bit more complex.
They don’t get turn on by everything female and what probably turned a man on when he was 25 is completely different from what turns him on today, 15 years later.

I also think that some of the men who answered the question imagined themselves in a particular moment and gave the answer according to that.
For example:

-smart women
-women who can hold a conversation
-thoughtful women

I can say that those men didn’t picture any particular woman when they answered. So if they could choose, they would probably pay more attention to the kind of women mentioned above.

Answers like:

-role playing
-wet t-shirts
-not shy between the sheets

Those men were probably thinking about someone in particular. Like once they have the woman, those are the things that turn them on.

None of the men mentioned porn. Strange? Not really if you think for a bit why men like porn, and when.

Getting the responses about ‘depends on the situation and the person’ and also what turns at least of one of the men off, made me smile.

-the lack of mutual attraction
-the wrong place
-bad timing

Men and women are not so different after all. It seems that we are all looking for the same things and once we found them, we can concentrate in what turns us on in that particular person.

I hope my research wasn’t too vague and please let me know if you disagree.

~ by DotedOn on May 26, 2015.

22 Responses to “272”

  1. Reblogged this on SURVIVORS BLOG HERE.


  2. NICE – thank you for doing this, it was interesting. How many people responded altogether?

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Well done research! Yes we are a bit more complex than just getting turned on by wet t-shirts. But, wet t-shirts…where was I going with this? šŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This is very interesting and really there’s not much to disagree with. Some men just get turned on by anything, and some really want to find something in a woman other than her looks, and, yes, age is definitely a big factor in this. Funny what your twins says, couples therapy, sex therapy, all very interesting fields although I’m sure they would take a lot of schooling. Thank you for using some of my comments. I’m glad they were helpful.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Hi T P
    I think you look beautiful in the photo. You’re wearing our scarf!!!!!! It looks great on you worn like that. Good research, this is a great on going project for you. Keep the sex questions coming, you’ll have fun asking. Who knows where research will go, it must be fun.
    T M

    Liked by 1 person

  6. most interesting…..for me the woman who turns me on the most is: the woman with the less amount of ego. i.e. who doesn’t constantly talk about other people etc.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Very good P! I think you came to some very good conclusions. Analysis, research, and investigation is my field of work and I always appreciate when someone does their homework before offering subjective qualitative analysis as intrinsic quantified facts.

    To look at third order effects when asking what turns a man on we naturally gravitated to sexuality when in fact men are often “turned on” very much (in the absence of sexuality) by other stimulus like sports, accomplishment, family achievements, and there are turn-ons for men that far surpass sex.

    These things women can’t compete with but can receive the benefits of if they happen to be available during/after the significant event or share in the excitement. Men will often transfer their excitement of a non-sexual event to their sexual partner. Men will often judge the quality of a non-sexual event to the joy of sex. Comments like, “That was better than *name you favorite sex act*” Are often heard as well as; “I would NOT give up a *name your favorite sex act* for that!”

    Under sustained stressful events that require close teamwork like military service in combat or highly competitive sports teams, men will bond very tightly and will resent a women that tries to break that bond for her own self interest. If you want to be hated viciously just try to pry a bonded male pair apart. When that happens, bad things occur if it wasn’t a willing decision on the man’s part.

    Regardless, in the absence of some deviation from established norms, men most desire a woman that will share in his life and let him live without judging him harshly for his failures. When harsh judgement enters a relationship and is sustained, the relationship is damaged.

    It is far better to attempt growth and learning in a non threatening way and if that is unsuccessful then it just isn’t going to work.

    As for porn. Pornography is visually stimulating for many but a lot of men don’t associate porn with their partner unless it’s their partner presenting the porn. Of course, porn is like anything else addictive. It can become an obsession and it can interfere with normal relationships.

    My question you might answer would be in those instances where a woman observes her male partner frequently obtaining significant satisfaction from a non-sexual activity that excludes her (for what ever reason) Does she feel her relationship is threatened by this external activity?

    Thanks for letting me bloviate on your blog and of course, it’s just my opinion based on being a male that was around thousands of other males for significant periods of time with an unfortunate lack of females to keep us under control. We do get rowdy if we aren’t closely supervised. šŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    • I don’t know why I thought all the men were going to answer something like: black underwear, big boobs, lace or mini skirts… I was really surprised about the answers (gladly surprised :D).
      I like to know what men think or how you perceive things, it’s really interesting.
      I more or less knew the age of all the men who answered and it’s amazing how the way of thinking change with age (and if the man was single or married).
      I’ll try to do more of this little researches, I enjoyed it very much… But it was a lot of work, even with less than 15 responses! šŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

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