302

302

Wednesday. What a day! And it’s not even half gone. I slept really bad last night. My stress level is really high, my left eye is twitching and until now, only the man’s mother could achieve such a thing.
I’m behind reading blogs and I don’t like it. I got the papers to do the driving exam, it will happen in about two weeks. On Friday I have to go to the doctor and I’m terrified. I wrote to my sick friend because I want to call her before her operation and I didn’t get any answer yet, I’m not sure if I still have her telephone number, or where. I had a few misunderstanding with a friend and I didn’t have the chance to clarify the situation. The more time passing, the more my stomach hurts, I want to have that solved soon. I also woke up to some bad news about another friend and I’m a bit sad.

Yesterday morning I got a message from David, the brother of the girl that wrote to me last week. I replied and got this email back.

Screen Shot 2015-06-24 at 11.42.57 AM

After I replied to it explaining a bit more of what happened with me and the man, he sent me another email that I found this morning. Punctuation is missing so I’m not completely sure what he meant. The last question made me stress really bad.

Screen Shot 2015-06-24 at 11.44.25 AM

What kind of relationship am I seeking???

I feel like if I went to a store and the woman asked: “How can I help you?” “Hi, I hate being single, I want to have a relationship” “Ok, what kind of relationship are you seeking?”
I really don’t know how to answer that. I guess I want a good relationship. Anyway, today is not a good day to answer that question because I don’t even care.
I have no idea what he meant with the question. Is he asking the category of relationship? (like: girlfriend-boyfriend, f#$cking buddies, friends with benefits??). I’m not sure what I have to reply.

So what I did this morning was take the kids to school, get back home, undress and go back to bed for two more hours.
I’m glad I did that. I could escape this day for two hours. I wish I can do it again. My heads hurts. I need to learn how to handle stress. Escaping is always good. Closing my eyes so I can’t see the problem works pretty well too. The bad thing is that I still can’t deal with my feelings and emotions. I can’t close my heart, I can’t keep it shut.

~ by DotedOn on June 24, 2015.

25 Responses to “302”

  1. Reblogged this on SURVIVORS BLOG HERE.

    Like

  2. Hugs xo

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I wouldn’t look to closely into this relationship you have. Writing is therapeutic and it looks like it could be a good thing for both of you, for now at least. Where is this guy located? Sorry you are having so much stress in your life.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. His punctuation is bad, but it looks like his heart is in the right place! Don’t rush, if it’s right, it will happen.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I Have to say it! This guy seems beyond broken, and you sound really depressed. The last thing you need is someone who is going to bring you down. I am just looking out for you and don’t mean for this to sound critical. PM me if you want to talk. My ears/eyes are open.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Going back to bed sounds so comforting and healing.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Just my very unsophisticated and dull opinion but it seems the best way to answer the questions is something simple and easy like, “looking for someone that can appreciate me the way I am,” or something along those lines. No need to confess the physical attributes and intimate desires. Of course, if you want to back the person away, you might say something like, “I’m looking for a man that likes to dress up like a Fairy godmother and grant me wishes.” If that doesn’t send them packing you know you have a real situation on your hands. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • 🙂 We are still messaging and he seems nice. He didn’t ask me how I looked yet… Either he knows me or he’s truly different! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Do you know where he is from originally? It seems English is difficult for him in the emails. That would be an amazing connection out of the blue sky from his sister’s accidental receipt of an email you didn’t send.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I have my suspicions that he’s from Nigeria but when I asked he denied it.
        He’s kind of sweet (but I shouldn’t trust my instincts because they are mostly wrong!!) 😀

        Liked by 1 person

      • Remain cautiously optimistic. Scammers are very clever at luring their victims with good stories.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I don’t even want to think about that… I had enough of crap in that area already 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • Everyday I get email where somebody wants to enhance my favorite body part and send me a million dollars. I can’t figure out how so many people want to help me out. No Thanks!

        Liked by 1 person

      • I get the same emails and I wonder how I could enlarge the penis I don’t have!! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • I think you might be wasting money with that effort. Maybe something unexpected would happen. It would be so hard to explain. “I ate the magic beans I got for only 30 euro and poof, there it was…” OMG! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • hahahahahaha 🙂
        Only 30 euros!! That was the perfect deal! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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