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Saturday. I went to the doctor yesterday. I was terrified. I don’t like going to the doctor and going to the gynecologist is awful for me. I have bad experiences, specially with one back in Cowshitland who was wearing Texan boots.
I don’t like going alone but I really didn’t want to ask the man to go there with me so I asked him only to drive me there and stay with my kids. I told my oldest kids to wait for his father at the bus stop at 12.30pm. My appointment was at the same time.
Ten minutes later, my oldest son sent me a message telling me that my 2nd son was nowhere to be seen. I panicked. It was 1.20pm, I was still in the waiting room and my 2nd son was still lost.
I was called by the doctor’s assistant to answer some questions about my health. While she was doing something on the computer, I took my phone and asked again if my boy was finally found… At that moment, the assistant said something like: “You have to answer me some questions, you can’t play with your phone”. I’m not sure how I didn’t hit her. I said in broken German that my son was lost and that I was really nervous.
She asked a bunch of questions and then I got a message from my 2nd son saying he was at the bus stop and nobody was there. (That was almost 1.5 hours later). I quickly wrote to call his brother and tell him he was there.
When I was relaxing, the assistant said: “You have to wait at the doctor’s office and HE’ll run some tests” “Sorry, HE?? I made the appointment with Dr. Elena Something” “She’s not here”. At that moment, I started to cry. The assistant didn’t know what to say or do: “Would you like a new appointment?” “No, I can’t wait anymore” “He’s a nice doctor, very gentle”.
So in this small town, about 35 people saw me crying already. I’m sure I’m known as “The Weeper”.
I walked to the doctor’s office, sat in front of his desk and starting imagining a huge German doctor with tremendous hands. You have to understand that I hate fingers, hands and strange objects in me. I was feeling really sad and alone.
Ten minutes later, the door opens and a tiny doctor comes in. Tiny because I’m 1,63m/5’4″ft and I was 3/4 head taller than him. I smiled and thought “I can take him down easily”.
He asked me to get naked from the waist down for the first exams. I did what he said and then he asked me to sit down on the ugly chair.
I couldn’t help but laughing at the view when he positioned the chair to examine me.
When he said: “Now go back and put on your pants and come back without your top and bra”.
That’s when I decided to sneak a picture:

The tiny doctor came from Indonesia and he had put that nice jungle picture on top of the ugly chair to create a diversion I guess. It worked, it made me laugh. Can you see how small he is?

After the ugly chair, the horrible bed.

More tests got done.
Then he told me to dress up again and said: “I don’t see anything strange, I think you feel this way because of your situation” “Do you mean, my age?” “Hahahaha, No, I think you are very stressed. Anyway, you have to keep an eye on it” “And the bleeding” “That could be from your contraception method”.

So I shouldn’t worry about my health for now. I’m a bit relieved. Still, there is a lot in my mind.
I can’t wait for the day when I can sit down and relax (without having to drink half a bottle of wine to achieve it).

~ by DotedOn on June 27, 2015.