Wednesday. Yesterday I got really sad news from a friend. Bad news in general make me really sad and when those news are health related, the “no time to lose” feeling wakes up in me and I do whatever it takes to feel better. I don’t sit and mourn for long, I act. I have today, I may not have tomorrow.

I mentioned before that I had a boyfriend, Damián. We were together for over 3 years and he left me very conveniently, just before the summer holidays, probably because he wanted to go with his friends somewhere and have fun. I can tell because of the way how he left me. He waited for an excuse and he finally had it: “If you go to your friend’s birthday, I’ll leave you”. “Then leave me because I’m not missing my friend’s party”. And that was it.

December 1992. A couple of weeks before both of us went on vacation, we met and he said: “Go on, live your life because I’m going to live mine”. “Are you sure???”. You have to imagine that when a guy says that to me, I follow that to the T. And that is, I follow my grandma’s advice that can be translated as: “The best way to get over a guy, is to get under another one”.

So I met another guy, Fabio. Another day I’ll tell that story. The important thing here is that I ended up heartbroken 3 or 4 days before going on vacation with my parents. I was so sad and depressed that I thought I was going to die crying.
Believe it or, it took me only those 3 or 4 days to recover because as soon as we got to the hotel, I saw this guy checking in two feet away from my dad and I kind of resuscitated. And when two days later I could have that guy, I didn’t doubt it for a second.
My holidays ended and I was back home. A few days later, Damián called and said he wanted to see me. He came to my house and gave me a present, a bracelet. I couldn’t understand why he did that, he never gave me presents or anything.
He said I looked really happy and then he asked me about my holidays and if I had met someone… How could I lie?!?! Even if I wanted to lie, I couldn’t hide the sparkle in my eyes.
And that was the end. He couldn’t stomach the idea of me with someone else. It was February 1993 then.
At the end of that year, Damián asked me: “Do you think your uncle needs someone like me in his company?” “Let me ask”. Three days later, he was working there.
About half a year passed and I was kind of moving on and realizing that the less attention I paid to Damián, the more interested he seemed. Anyway, I knew we were NEVER going to be together again, even though we still had kind of something every now and then.
It was July 1994 and I was going for a month to Europe with my sister. Like 2 days before coming back from the trip, I met in Spain a Dutch guy, Stef. I had never ever before felt anything like that for anyone. Let’s say it was my first “Love at First Sight” experience. It was a really deep love that lasted only 2 days (you can laugh).

The same day I was back, my mom asked to call a woman who also worked for the same company with my uncle and Damián. When she picked up the phone she said:
“Do you want to talk to Dami? He’s not at his desk now”
“No, actually my mom wanted to talk to you”
“Oh… ok. I’m surprised! Did you meet any other guy?”
“I did!”
“That’s great!! As soon as Dami comes near, I’ll say something so he knows about it”.
“Ok, hahahahahaha”.
So when Damián got back to his desk, this nice woman said something like: “I’m so happy for you, PAOLA!! I’m glad you had such a great time”… And then I passed the phone to my mom.
Half an hour later, the woman called me to tell me that as soon as Damián knew it was me on the phone, he stayed there waiting but then he heard her saying bye and was kind of surprised and disappointed.

A couple of hours later guess who was at the door? Damián, of course! He saw me and he was like paralyzed. “What’s wrong?” “Nothing, you look SO beautiful”.

I love men, I could kiss all of them, sweet little creatures… but at the same time, I don’t f#$king understand them a bit and I feel like kicking their balls.
Damián was the kind of guy who never said compliments or anything… he barely talked. For me to hear that, was exactly what I needed… Too little, too late.

I didn’t remember Stef in almost 20 years until yesterday. As I mentioned above, sad news make me crave good news and I remembered a postcard that Stef sent to me the day after we said goodbye in 1994.

Screen Shot 2015-11-25 at 10.17.19 AM

It says: Hi lovely-one,
How are you, still “heel blij” (that means ‘very happy’ in Dutch). I hope. Did you cry after our saying goodbye? I didn’t, but I’m sure I’ll never forget you. I just wrote in my diary: “She is greatly kind, sweet and deep-feeling”.
I love the passion that shines in your eyes when you talk about something you like very much. It’s very nice to know that there’s someone in Argentina who I love and who loves me, and I’m going to see you again, once.
I wish you all the best till we meet again.
Many hugs and kisses. Stef

I made copies of that postcard and kept one in my wallet for very long. Every time I felt sad for something, I sat down and read those words until I could smile again.

~ by DotedOn on November 25, 2015.

16 Responses to “456”

  1. Reblogged this on SURVIVORS BLOG HERE.


  2. No kicking there! It hurts. But, he was not nice to leave like that, but the card is very nice.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It’s a nice souvenir to cheer you up… the postcard. It’s lovely he sent it. As for Dami, well we always want what we can’t have, right? There is a show here in America that used to be on called Friends and throughout the show there was an on again off again love affair between two of the characters. Well, they called it off for a while and then she had an affair with another man and he found out and never let her forget it. It became a catch phrase on the show to bring up her cheating and then she would say ‘We were on a break!’ Anyway, your story reminded me of that.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. It’s a nice momento from a good time. It wouldn’t occur me to carry something like that around as a talisman to cheer me up, but I’m glad you did.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. ‘I don’t f#$king understand them a bit’….. 😀 that goes for me also, I enjoy being around women but don’ understand the, I love them but don’t have one. I agree with the above, it’s nice to have a souvenir to cheer you up.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. It was a sweet memory. To me, a man writing a love postcard is precious and Stef’s words were very sweet. I can imagine how happy you are every time you read it. 😉 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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