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Saturday. A few more days until the school ends. I’m stressed again because all the activities that could be done during the entire school year, are planned for these last days. Picnics, trips, fund risings, farewells. That, times five, is like a lot for me. I can’t split so I have to choose and sometimes my choices don’t make all my kids happy. And for sure, they don’t make me happy.

I have my ex’s small car parked in my driveway. He said I could use it and I said I didn’t dare. He offered me to go for a ride whit him so I accepted.
Now I understand why nobody wants that car. It’s heavy. To change gears you have to push the clutch with all your strength. The gear stick is also almost impossible to move. To turn the steering wheel you need to train your muscles because it’s really hard.
And if all that wasn’t enough, the tires needed air. Driving it was really difficult.

Yesterday I sent a message to my ex saying I was going to the gas station to take care of the tires. I asked my oldest son to come with me. The gas station is practically around the corner and we needed to pass one street light. Of course I got the red light and when I wanted to keep going, the car just stopped so I had to restart it. I took ONLY 5 seconds but the asshole behind me decided to hoot and then he got irritated again because I had to turn to get to the gas station. I HAD to show him a finger and I felt really sorry I didn’t have enough time to tell him what I thought about him.
Ugh… I’m not sure if everywhere it’s the same but here on Fridays everyone is crazy. They want to get home NOW and nobody has the patience to wait one second.

I didn’t know how much air the tires needed so I decided to put the same amount that my instructor’s car needed.
The trip back home was like walking on clouds. The car was SO light. I decided to park it in the driveway going in reverse but because I miscalculated a bit, I got TOO close to the pine trees (read: I had all the branches blocking my sight).
“Mom, what are you doing?”
“Don’t worry, I plan to trim these trees soon.”

Then I sent a message to my ex saying: “Your car weights half a ton less”.

Later in the evening he came to bring my kids from a picnic and asked:
“How much air did you put?” When I told him he said: “Are you insane? No wonder you felt like you were floating! I think that you have to go again to the gas station and take some out”.
“I’m not sure that will be happening. I think I’ll leave it here and wait until they deflate a bit”. He stared at me and didn’t dare to say a thing.
Then he looked at the bumper and was a bit puzzled. He went a bit closer and said: “Didn’t you realize there is half a pine tree hanging here?”
I had to laugh and I couldn’t stop laughing. He looked at me exactly the same way he did while we were together. I saw the face I never again wanted to see in my life.

That was f#$king funny, how could he not laugh? There was no damage done to the car, only a bit to the tree.
Anyone else would have laughed with me, I’m sure of that. They would have laughed because of the deed or because of my contagious laughter.
He never got me.

A few minutes before leaving he said: “Aren’t you scared of spending all those days with me?”
“I’m terrified! But don’t worry, we don’t need to talk and we can always build a wall in the house”.

What the f#$k was I thinking?

~ by DotedOn on June 11, 2016.

6 Responses to “655”

  1. LOL, Paola, there is SO much to comment on in this post! I’ll do it in order lol

    1) End of school year was always pressure, but June seems to be the month for SO many things—including weddings!

    2) It seems your ex’s initial comment about the car and no one wanting to drive it was a factual statement and not to discourage you, so I think with that in mind, you sometimes need to pause and re-evaluate how you interpret some of the things he says because we are ALL guilty of misinterpreting due to what we’ve come to perceive about someone and we’re not ALways right :-\

    3) Where I live, honking drivers (and MUCH worse than that) is commonplace; it’s not just reserved for Fridays, I hate to say. If anyone really wants to hear my “truck driver” mouth, just get in a car with me. Other drivers here REALLY bring it out!

    4) This actually made me laugh out loud! lol
    “Mom, what are you doing?”
    “Don’t worry, I plan to trim these trees soon.”

    5) You do have to be careful with tire pressure and I know I’ve never been good at it ’cause the tool I have to measure it never seems to be accurate enough :-\

    6) And I think that last statement shows the sad dynamic that developed between you and your ex 😦 It’s not that either of you was right or wrong—you just see things differently and go about life differently. Honestly, seeing as he didn’t witness HOW the half a pine tree ended up on the bumper, he wasn’t going to see it as funny. I probably would’ve looked at you incredulously too if I hadn’t heard the dialogue between you and your son first—the dialogue and story that made me laugh. That’s not to say he would’ve laughed if he HAD heard it, but these things make a difference and your hurtful history with him probably lends to you not allowing yourself to see his perceptions and reactions clearly all the time :-\ I know you don’t want to hear that, but it’s something I think you need to consider. Honestly, the fact that he asked if you were scared about the vacation says a lot about his awareness. Doesn’t mean he can change. Doesn’t mean you can change, but there seem to be misperceptions at play here, my dear :-\

    Thanks for the laugh, btw! lol

    Liked by 1 person

    • June is popular for weddings (and I just missed to congratulate my parents!! 😀 )
      I will reply to your comment with today’s post.
      I’m not a saint, I know that, but my ex is not nice with me and he wants to be always in control and never misses a chance to make me feel guilty or stupid.
      I didn’t write all the things that happened because I feel sad for allowing him to still treat me like if I were his daughter.
      He’ll never change. He never accepted me and he always tried to change me.
      If he wants me back it’s because he HATES to be alone and he misses his clothes clean and dinner served when he gets back from work. Nothing else.
      He has NO IDEA how to treat a woman 🙂


  2. For the trip… Take tape… run it down the center of the house. You have your side, he has his.. hehe.. yeah, he might not find that funny either.. oh well, his loss.

    Liked by 1 person

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