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Thursday. A couple of days ago I was reading an article about the five biggest regrets people have before they die.
If you are reading this blog for some time, you already know that I’m TERRIFIED of dying. The thing that scares me the most is not being able to do all the things I want to do before I die. The idea of being breathing my last breaths and thinking something like: “And I never got married, or went to China, or learned how to play the mandolin”, kills me. I don’t want to write the obvious like: I want to see my kids healthy, grown up and all that because as I mentioned before, it’s obvious. I’m not ready to die and I don’t think I ever will. There is so much I still want to do that I think I need a few more lifetimes to accomplish at least half of that.

Going back to the article. There is a nurse who recorded all the biggest regrets that her dying patients had.

These are the five biggest with a little explanation.

1. Not being true to yourself (By focusing too much on what your parents, co-workers, or peers expect of you, you may be keeping yourself from reaching your full potential, leaving dreams unfulfilled and unattainable. By the time most people realize the value of listening to your heart, it’s often too late.

2. Working too hard (Spending too much time at work is the biggest regret parents have about their children’s early years. The study found that more than three quarters of parents have at least one thing that they regret doing, or not doing, during the children’s early years.

3. The courage to express your feelings (Many people suppress their feelings as a way to keep peace with others. By doing that they keep resentment, anger and bitterness inside them. It takes courage and self-assurance to express your feelings but if you do so, you can live a fuller life devoid of regret).

4. Distance between old friends (People on their deathbed were able to understand the significant value of old friends and special friendships, and often tried to reconnect with those they had let slip away).

5. Loss of happiness (Apparently, most people don’t realize that happiness is a choice you make everyday. She found that people were fearful of change and found themselves pretending to others, and themselves that they were content when they really wanted to let go and find true happiness).

You probably wonder why this nurse did that. Her idea was to write all that information in her blog so she could help people live their lives to the fullest. I really admire that. I’m pretty much doing that myself. Sometimes I feel like hanging banners everywhere reminding people to “LIVE” (because I know that most people only survive).

What really got me thinking after reading the article was this. The same way I read it, I believe a lot of other people did.
For example: I’m hospitalized and I read that article. Then I recall that the previous day that nurse was here asking me about my regrets. How the f#$k would I feel?

We have a saying in my country for when someone is about to die: “Está más cerca del arpa que de la guitarra” (He/She is closer to the harp than to the guitar).

Because when we think of a harp, we mostly have this idea:

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So I believe it’s an awful feeling knowing you are tuning your harp.

I know we are all tuning our own harps but I’d like to take at least 100 years to tune mine.

If you would like to see the original article, you can find it here.


~ by DotedOn on August 4, 2016.

14 Responses to “709”

  1. Yes, definitely good to be reminded of this stuff while we are alive and well. Thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. My bucket list is very long and a tall order, but hopefully it will pan out. I do wish I spent more time with my daughter when she was growing up.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Reblogged this on WP.Andrew and commented:
    My very first ‘Reblog’, a Post written by the lovely Paola 🙂 . So what about number 5 then! “Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice”.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Paola I would say having children is such a big achievement, one of my regrets I guess is not having my own but there you are lol I’d only f#ck it up! A daughter would have been nice, father and his ‘princess’ is a very special relationship isn’t it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh Andrew! I wish I could say that about father and daughter. I’m for sure my father’s princess (one of them) but I can’t say the same about my daughter and her father.
      I think I wrote about the day when we found out we were having a girl. That day I knew I was going to leave him.

      I can’t find the post. I’ll try a bit more and if I don’t find it, I’ll tell you what happened 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I, too, HATE that I missed a good chunk of my son’s childhood because of financial pressures. I will always regret it and resent what certain people took from me. But it’s in the past and can’t be changed.

    It is because life is so short and so much of it is a struggle that we have to grab whatever brings us happiness when it does. When you have many interests and a true love for all that life can be about, it’s impossible to fit it all in 😦 That’s one reason I hope I’m considered worthy for the “everlasting” part of what’s promised. I’m not so sure. (And, no, in case you think I’m referring to heaven, I’m not ’cause that’s not what’s promised.)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh Donna, I’m sorry you regret that too!
      At the moment we do what we think it’s best… If we knew in advance for sure what’s going to happen, things would be so much different! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Yes, that’s why people want to believe in things like crystal balls, horoscopes, and fortune telling. Anything that will keep from having to make decisions and mistakes for themselves. Trust me, I wish wonderfully imaginative and magical things like Time Turners and time-travelling DeLoreans were real! lol

        Liked by 1 person

      • Hahaha! I want a DeLorean too!! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  6. I love that saying. Sad, but great.

    Liked by 1 person

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